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KIM DONALD

Our Humble Attempt to Bring World Peace

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Could a couple of pairs of budgie smugglers help bring the world back from the cusp of nuclear war? We bloody hope so.
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As much as we’ve tried to turn a blind eye to all the bad stuff happening in 2017, it’s been hard to ignore a certain public slagging match between two men at the helm of nuclear weapons arsenals. No doubt many good souls around the world have been praying for a positive conclusion to the spectacle, but sometimes prayers just aren’t enough on their own. It’s time to act.

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So this Xmas, Love Riot MFCEO Rohan Inglis did just that. One hungover December morning, Rohan decided he could no longer just sit on the fence and hope for the best, it was time to do our bit. So in a humble attempt at facilitating world peace he put down his beer and put pen to paper.

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“With all due respect it’s about time someone had a word with these guys. I can kind of understand where both of them are coming from, but at the end of the day no argument or ego is worth killing people for, let alone the risk of killing thousands or millions for. Let’s face it, they’re both right and they’re both wrong, but with nuclear weapons no one’s a winner, and everyone’s a loser.”

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“Call me a hippie but I think it’s high time Kim and Donald had a big hug. But seeing as they’re clearly not going to be meeting up any time soon, a good ol’ hug is off the cards, so I figured this might be the next best way to try and lighten the mood between them. We all know how interfering in other people’s problems usually causes more harm than good, so normally when I see people arguing I gladly leave them to it. But in this case, when there’s so much at stake for everyone, I figured it’s probably worth giving my two pence. Fingers crossed they appreciate the effort.”

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There you have it. We’ve not heard anything back from Kim Jung-Un’s or President Trump’s respective teams as yet, or seen any declarations of kissing and making up on Trump’s twitter account, but we live in hope that 2018 is finally going to be the year all the terrorism, war and weirdness comes to an end. The year we all breath a sigh of relief, and say a massive collective “Thank f**k for that!”

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If you’re feeling brave and fancy joining our quest, grab yourself a pair here…

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